Tuesday, January 10, 2017

30 second rule? Uh, no. Not quite

Day 2 of this blog and I almost forgot about it. I’ve actually been productive today.  Youngest son surprised me with a big math project last night (GRRRRR) and while working with him on it, I got a grocery list done.  My weekly grocery list is one of those things that, in an effort to streamline it, make it easier and more efficient, I’ve probably made it more cumbersome.   It’s a huge master list I choose things from.  I mean, in the long run it’s still more efficient because I have a horrible memory and usually don’t think of things I need until I’ve already shopped.  My family’s gotten really good at putting things we run out of on the grocery list, but I still need a big list of regular things to look at while making my big list.  And in an effort to save money, I get a set amount out of the bank every two weeks and when it’s gone, it’s gone.  So that adds pressure to the list because if I don’t know the priorities (i.e., you need chicken to make fried chicken – yes, I’ve done that – planned an entrée and made sure I had all the seasonings etc only to realize I forgot to check for the main ingredient), then I spend money on lesser priorities and then when I go to make dinner, I better find something else to fry because no money, no chicken.  Anyway, so I’ve made my grocery shopping prep time-consuming on the back end to save time on the front end, but it also makes me dread making the list.  It really doesn’t take THAT long but it involves looking at a long, boring list and boredom is not a friend of mine.

So I made the list and told my almost-19-yo that I was going grocery shopping this morning and he was going along.  Tired of him vegging in front of Skyrim (he goes back to college Sunday).   I haven’t shopped for real since the week before Christmas – just been piddling money away on quick trips for necessities (which turned into splurge trips on not-necessities – as evidenced by the two chips ahoy bags in the trash this week).  Thrilled we got that done but it’s 2:24 and I still have groceries all over.  Plus I decided to strip the beds before we left – one of those tasks that I don’t think about without a reminder and I have no routine right now since I’m totally off my to do lists (still haven’t looked at them – really hoping there’s not some dire thing that I threw onto the list and out of my mind before Christmas that I assumed I would take care of in January.  I know myself better now than I used to, though, so I probably didn’t do something stupid like trust in myself).   My son said “my bedding could really use a wash, Mom” which made me feel like mom of the year.  True he could do it himself (and would) but they are all used to me controlling the laundry like a Nazi and don’t typically just wash something without at least running it by me first.  I realized it had probably been about 3 weeks since I did bedding.  Certainly not my longest run of not washing sheets (by a long shot) but this particular kid is smell-sensitive and has gotten used to me having a pretty good routine and not having to sleep on rotten smelly sheets.  He does his own laundry at college and I think he keeps it up pretty well.  The other kid still at home, his sheets could probably rot completely under him and he wouldn’t notice.  He’s the kid that will sleep on a bare mattress for a week to avoid making up his bed with fresh sheets. 

Anyway, as I always do, I have several things going at once and the house would look bad to anyone walking in.  It doesn’t bother me because it’s pretty straight underneath (wow, “straight underneath” – I can really justify a mess!  That’s like talking about my awesome 6-pick under 30 pounds of flabby belly) and I know I can swoop around and get stuff away but I’d love to learn to always have a visitor-ready house.  I’ve accomplished it a few times in my journey but never easily, never for more than a few months, and never without becoming cranky Mom.  So I have groceries all over, and I unload the mousetraps I bought from Lowe’s and decide to set them up in the pantry.  Which leads to me tripping over a folded cardboard box next to the pantry.  My brain says “hey, you can box up some of that there decluttering you started the other day, you know, the crap all over the ping pong table that you were too lazy to get a box for, with this very handy box that would require more effort to put away with the other boxes than to use it.” 

So instead of putting the box with decluttering and going back to my original task, I not only box up what’s there but when the box is still half empty, I pull down two tubs of skinny clothes and decide that I need to get rid of some to fill the box.  I finish that and come back upstairs (only because the stove timer is going off from when I put a new soda in the freezer – we HAVE to use timers for that or we end up with solid sodas which are hard to drink without breaking your teeth).  I turn off the timer and get out the partially frozen soda (I must have let the timer go off longer than I thought – sometimes time has no relevance to me) and see it’s after 2.  And I remember, blog!  I go to start the blog (after setting a timer for 30 minutes to limit myself – go me!!) and realize I didn’t do the litterbox (one of my new must-dos) and thought about skipping it but, um, really do I want to do that my second freaking day???  After the litterbox, I realize the washer has stopped washing and our washer’s drum is rusty so if clothes sit too long, they get rust spots (hubby wants a new washer but 1 - I’m afraid to buy one, all new appliances are crap, 2 - who has that kind of money?? Have you seen the price of washers these days??, and 3 - it’s a major incentive for me to keep up with what’s in the washer, which I consider to be a good thing – so I’m fighting him on that one).  I move the washer load over, pulling the bedding that’s  in the dryer out onto the floor.

All of that is to say that the house I left neat to shop 5 hours ago, proud of myself, and NOBODY WAS HOME THOSE 5 HOURS, is now trashed.  Clean bedding on laundry room floor, grocery bags on laundry room floor and dining room floor, some pulled aside because they go to my son’s dorm Sunday, both of our coats on the backs of chairs, Walmart receipts on table from me stopping to photograph them and also put them in savings catcher, wallet on table, clothes for my son’s girlfriend on island that I rescued from the skinny clothes donation pile, half-frozen soda on counter, mouse trap packaging on counter and ipad that I used to look up how to set the mousetrap (I am not mechanically included), toilet paper roll on counter that I took from bathroom when I ran in to pee right when we got home and didn’t throw away because I want to use it to store lights, more groceries in and out of bags on the island and steps to go upstairs, and I’m not sure if I made a mess up there.  I know I went up there when we got home and I probably left a trail.  I will admit that when I say trashed, it’s really not trashed.  If you are reading this blog, you know what “trashed” really means.  But you also know that messes like these breed rampantly if you don’t throw some figurative cold water on them to stop it.

Even on my productive days, or maybe especially on my productive days, it’s just hard to function like a “normal” person.  But the 5-minute walk-through will help.  I did one this morning and will do another right after this blog.

Okay, this is something I want to say and maybe you will identify with this.  You know how they say “the key to keeping up with clutter is that if you see something that takes 30 seconds or less, just do it?”  Uh, no.  That is what gets me into these messes.  Distraction.  Sure, if I see trash on the floor, I should pick it up (I don’t, I’m just saying I should).  But moving my wallet from the washer to the basket where it belongs just makes me notice the empty pillbox in the basket that needs to be filled and then if I fill that (30 seconds or less) it would probably just make me notice that my son’s meds are getting low so that leads to a phone call to the pharmacy (30 seconds or less on the automated line) which means I pick up my phone and GOD FORBID I PICK UP MY PHONE.  I am soo anti-phone – I hate the addiction of everyone around me and that’s partially why I held out so long (that and my fat texting thumbs versus the touch screen and the fact that my s7 is too big to stick in my bra not to mention the cost of a data plan) but I am the first one to get sucked in.  See how those 30 second tasks can just kill my day?  It’s much much better for me to try to do a routine pickup than put stuff away as I see it.  I just have to totally remember to do the pickups. 


The writing of this blog isn’t going as planned.  I didn’t mean to come off as rambling psycho right away.  I was going to introduce you to the psycho me a little later, after you fall in love with me (that’s how I got my husband anyway).  But the main reason I’m starting it is to keep myself accountable for my new routines so at least that part seems to be working.  A whole two days’ worth anyway lol.  My timer says 2 minutes left of writing time so I’m gonna do a quick read through to make sure this is at least readable. Then off to do a 5-minute pickup that may turn into a 10 or 15 minute pickup but that can only be a good thing.  Assuming it doesn’t make me forget about something else (thank goodness for timers and alarms, my ultimate crutches). 

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